The Other March Madness

Your Weekly Premier League Update

By Jonathan Gault

While America’s attention turned to the NCAA tournament last weekend, sports fans across the pond were treated to some madness of their own with a Premier League weekend that saw an astounding 42 goals scored across 10 games. That tally is one short of the Premier League record for a weekend, set February 5-6, 2011. There were hat-tricks for Luis Suarez and Yaya Toure as the top three teams – Chelsea, Liverpool and Man City – combined for 17 goals.

With all those goals, we were sure to get a few stunners, and that was certainly the case. Wayne Rooney scored from just inside the halfway line at Upton Park, stirring up memories of David Beckham, who looked on from the stands. Toure’s third was sublime, a powerful, curling work of art from 30 yards out. And though Alex Tettey may lack the name recognition of those two players, but his volley for Norwich was just as good.

It’s been a big season for goals, particularly if you’re a Liverpool fan. Luis Suarez has scored 28 in 25 appearances. If he keeps that rate up, he’ll finish with 37, which would smash the existing record for goals in a 38-game (31) or 42-game season (34). Liverpool as a team have scored 82, which projects to 104 for a season – one more than Chelsea’s record from 2009-10. The Reds have a good shot to break that record, assuming Man City (currently on pace for 103) doesn’t get there first.

Returning to last weekend, there were no draws, which hurt most of the teams in the relegation battle. The bottom five teams entering the weekend all lost, so there was no change there. But there were still some important results, as Newcastle’s Papiss Cisse denied Crystal Palace a crucial point at the death, and Hull and Norwich created some breathing room at the bottom with wins over West Brom and Sunderland, respectively. The win for Norwich was particularly important, considering the Canaries close with Liverpool, Man U, Chelsea and Arsenal. Norwich is now seven points and five places above the drop zone. A win or two draws from its next three (at Swansea, West Brom, at Fulham) should be enough to ensure survival.  The teams in the most danger – Cardiff and Fulham – were both hammered by title-chasing opponents, which didn’t come as a surprise to anyone. Cardiff has a chance to redeem itself at West Brom next weekend. Fulham isn’t so lucky; a trip to Goodison Park looms.

The biggest game of the weekend was obviously Chelsea’s 6-0 demolition of Arsenal, a sad ending to Arsene Wenger’s 1,000th game in charge at the club. Just as Liverpool did in beating the Gunners 5-1 in February, Chelsea jumped out to an early lead, scoring on the break through Samuel Eto’o and Andre Schurrle to go 2-0 up after seven minutes. By the time Kieran Gibbs was sent off for Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain’s handball (an egregious error by referee Andre Marriner) and Eden Hazard converted the subsequent penalty, the match was over. The clock read 17 minutes.

What’s impressed me most about Chelsea this season is Jose Mourinho’s ability to seamlessly rework his club on the fly. In Chelsea’s first game of the season against Hull, he started Kevin De Bruyne and brought on Marco van Ginkel and Romelu Lukaku as substitutes. In the second match, against Aston Villa, Mourinho started Juan Mata and Demba Ba, again using van Ginkel and Lukaku off the bench. Chelsea won both games. Now, seven months later, De Bruyne, Lukaku and Mata are gone. Ba is rarely used and van Ginkel hasn’t made a Premier League appearance since. Some of the players most vital to the Blues success, such as Samuel Eto’o and Nemanja Matic, weren’t even on the team when the season started. 

But Eto’o’s goals and Matic’s domination of midfield – which has allowed Chelsea to spring its skill players on the counter-attack – have become a massive part of the club’s identity. Mourinho manages like a master sculptor, slicing away the detritus until all that remains is that which is essential to victory. Every move he makes – whether it’s deflecting Chelsea’s title chances in the press or leaving established veterans Frank Lampard and Ashley Cole on the bench – is geared specifically to winning the championship. It’s a joy to watch, and most importantly, it’s working.